"Stuck"

Wow...I don't even know where to begin so I guess at the top is a good place. I think I'm over my bad mojo. I've been working on a lace shawl. Beltane from Goddess Knits. It's perfect...not too hard that it's frustrating and not so easy that it's boring. See:




Actually, I'm a bit farther along than that-I finished that portion and picked up around the edge for the border. There's a few more of her shawls I want to get...they'll look great strewn over a book case and my bed's headboard. I'm going totally bohemian now that I'm 40.

Somebody started a roller coaster group on Ravelry. That was cool-I had thought about starting one not long after I got my invitation but didn't think there'd be enough people.

I've got an idea for a story. Actually, I had started it a while ago and didn't like how it was going so I put it aside. Now i've got some idea on where to go with it and was all excited to sit and write tonight and I can't. I get 'stuck'. I dunno what the hell is wrong with me. I'd got the ideas and I know it'll begin to write itself once I let go and become a passive vehicle but getting from "here" to there is the problem...I can see it all going on in my head but to click into that moment and do it...I dunno...

I was never like this...I used to write 9 pages per night EVERY NIGHT back in my 20's. I'd cook an idea during the evening, let it take shape and being to write about 9.30 or 10 at night and go until 2 or 3 in the morning. I was NEVER at a loss when it came to writing and now I have trouble...and it's not usually with the ideas bit just getting myself to click into that mindset and sit to do it. I dunno, I don't like it. I don't know if it's my environment (probably), my frame of mind...what.

I think I need a vacation from me. I keep hearing Pink's song "Don't Let Me Get Me" in my head...that's how I feel. What happened to that cosmic river of creativity that was so abundant in the 80's...it's just not there. I should probably have a glass of Absinthe or two...maybe I will...I dunno.....just not in the mood for alcohol. Oh this is horrible!

One thing I'm happy for is I got my roots done for my 40th birthday....my hair is so damn white, I'm over the moon with it. I'm so loving this. Why does it even matter?



I promised a few people another virtual ride on another coaster...next entry.


Now Playing: Pink ~ Just Like A Pill

Now Showing: Rosemary's Baby